Laughing and smiling
When suddenly
The ring I bought in Arizona
Silver and turquoise and jasper
Handmade by an old Navajo man
When I first saw the Grand Canyon
Crumbles to dust in my hands.
A favorite thing
Ruined beyond recognition
Irredeemably broken.
No explanation -
Just gone.
“Don’t you have a plane to catch?”
The question catches me off guard
Like a sudden blow.
I can’t pack my suitcase
(Where are all my clothes?)
(Where is my passport?)
The traffic is standstill
The lines are too long
I didn’t buy a seat
I have to leave
I have places to be.
But I can’t escape.
Spiders slowly emerge
From the comfortable layers of fabric and down
That make my bed warm.
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 - no, no
There are too many to count
One after another after another after another
Leg after leg after leg
They spread across my wall,
An army overtaking my home, my refuge.
Paralyzed by fear
As one hairy arachnid,
Its black eyes gleaming with hunger,
Crawls, creeps up my right leg
To my torso.
I can’t breathe
I can’t breathe
I can’t breathe
But please
Oh god, please
Kill it
Before it kills me
We climb up a snowy mountain
Shivering in sandals
No water
No food
Know better
I know better
Why am I here
Get me out of here
Turn back
Save yourselves
We are going to die
I scream and scream
No one turns to listen
Helpless
So helpless
I bolt straight up
I’m in my bed
Palms sweaty
Heart pounding
(no spiders)
A dream
A dream
It was just a dream.
It doesn’t fade like a dream.
Stuck in the ridges of my brain.
I may be awake
But I’m still afraid
Because when I sleep tonight
The demons will come
Crawling
Out of the canyons of my mind
To haunt my dreams again.
Author's note: I wrote this kind of for fun, just exploring a bunch of different dreams I'd had. I'm pretty prone to anxiety dreams, and I'm pretty used to them, but I wanted to try to capture the emotions I feel while I'm in the midst of them.
